• Decency8401@discuss.tchncs.de
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    6 months ago

    In my culture, it is almost weird for men to have feelings. Everybody knows that men aren’t emotionless machines, but they sometimes forget that. So you can guess that hugging a man as a man is somewhat weird. Before COVID, it was common to give handshakes; after that, pretty much every interaction stopped. Yes, I would really wish that it became more socially accepted. Because I think, When everybody interacts on a physical level, people will be less tense and more relaxed.

    Edit: Well I need to correct myself, I think it is not really a social problem, but it rather is a me problem. I’m not very comfortable with touching somebody so it could be that I’ve been ignoring those interactions for years.

    • Wahots@pawb.socialOP
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      6 months ago

      This thread has been really interesting, and a couple comments seem to really hit the nail on the head in terms of social isolation and the fallout it can cause. I think the pandemic definitely played a part in that.

      However, this thread also gives me a lot of hope. The comments and experiences are far more diverse than I thought they’d be :)

    • noughtnaut@lemmy.world
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      6 months ago

      “Men must be stoic no matter what!”

      “Men are such insensitive dolts!”

      “All men are part of the patriarchy!”

      …yeah, we’re not making it easy for men to show affection, are we?

  • zxqwas@lemmy.world
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    6 months ago

    No, I’m not.

    As for social acceptance I like my personal space. Don’t care what you do as long as I can opt out.

  • HEXN3T@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    7 months ago

    Yes. Absolutely. I’m the relatively rare hyper-social under-stimulated autistic type, in a friend group of people that aren’t into close contact and frequent interaction. It’s incredibly frustrating, but I’m distrusting of new people, and, ultimately, they’ve always been there for me. Despite my :3ness.

    I had a smaller group that was into it for a little while, but that time has passed. Very, very passed. We don’t talk about that.

  • Fern@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    I’m a big hugger. I wish that there was more affection between men, I often worry I’m making other men uncomfortable and then in turn I get uncomfortable about it. The whole thing makes me far more stressed than I wish it did honestly.

    • Nachorella@lemmy.sdf.org
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      7 months ago

      There’s one guy in my little group of friends who is an unapologetic hugger, even though the rest of us don’t really hug he’ll always hug everyone goodbye. I’d say it’s possible some guys don’t enjoy it, but I actually really appreciate it about him, it’s nice getting a hug and sometimes I really need one.

      For anyone who really doesn’t like it they can always offer their hand first, but on behalf of all the guys who need a little affection from their buds sometimes I wanna say thanks for being there for the friends who need it. Even if they never say so I’m sure some of them appreciate it.

      • Monument@lemmy.sdf.org
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        6 months ago

        I’ve been watching Bridgerton lately and it took me too long to realize that “offering their hand” meant handshake.
        Like, how is proposing less familiar than hugging?

    • folkrav@lemmy.ca
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      7 months ago

      My sister’s partner is like that. His whole family is the same, from what I could see. It’s not as natural for me, despite my family not being particularly cold either. It’s a me problem, though, so IMHO it shouldn’t deter you. Keep normalizing that shit.

  • Hugh_Jeggs@lemm.ee
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    7 months ago

    Hugging ✅

    Snuggling - Not really a problem

    Playful wrestling - Guaranteed the guy who instigated it is in the closet, same with most people who watch actual wrestling

  • Bizzle@lemmy.world
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    6 months ago

    I really like personal space. I hug my family because we’re close and we hug, and I’ll hug my closer dawgs if they need it, but most of the time I want people to respect my personal space.

  • DV8@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    I do more than playfully wrestle with my friends. As I do BJJ. I actively try to choke them out or try to break their limbs or try to tear their ligaments apart. It’s very fun for all. Though while it’s open to anyone I do get most people wouldn’t enjoy it. It’s personally physical to the extreme since on top of the close physical contact you’re also sweating all over each other to the point sweat dripping in your eyes or mouth will statistically happen at least once.

    Honestly if you feel like you miss playful fighting with friends, do a trial class of it.

    • Zagorath@aussie.zone
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      7 months ago

      Happy cake day!

      My friends take about stabbing each other, because we do HEMA. Sometimes slight grappling gets involved. Much less physically…intimate, but still very open to verbal inuendo.

      • DV8@lemmy.world
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        7 months ago

        Cool! Yeah, they also have Ringen which also can be nice! I tried sword fighting a couple of times but I don’t like the competition form of it (also I’m bad at it).

      • DV8@lemmy.world
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        7 months ago

        I guess that’s just the intentional innuendo I use about it. If you look up bjj memes (or Craig Jones) you’ll find most people preempt the jokes insecure people might make about dressing up in lycra and wrestling with other sweaty men in a padded room.

  • wallmenis@lemmy.one
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    6 months ago

    I like hugs… I am ok and like a good hug from anyone. I am just scared to initiate. Hate snuggling or wrestling. Feels weird.

  • Modva@lemmy.world
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    7 months ago

    Snuggling? Uh, that’s a hard no. I can’t imagine that. I’d be extremely uncomfortable.

    Hugging? Yup, lots of hugging in my friends and family.

    I don’t wish for more physical affection among males, seems good as is.

  • moonburster@lemmy.world
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    6 months ago

    Hugging yes, “playful” wrestling no. When we wrestle we do it hard and I 8/10 times come home bruised