Power over another person, the prerequisite for most sexual violence, doesn’t have to come from superior physical strength. It could come from an age difference, a professor-student or boss-employee dynamic, or some form of blackmail, for example. And the body can experience physical arousal in response to the right stimuli even when you don’t want to have sex. You can also do acts of sexual violence that do not require an erect penis.

Just using stimulus alone will achieve erection.

Well some woman on the street can definitely drag you to a corner and do a lot of sexual things to yoy without consent. Thats rape.

By your logic a woman couldn’t be raped because she got wet and had an orgasm. Getting an erection isn’t a conscious thing that men will by, like lifting an arm. Plenty of men also get physically abused by their girlfriends / wives, despite being physically stronger and technically able to overpower them. If you really cannot fathom how psychological pressure & abuse works then I am not sure where to even start. I got raped by my ex early in my life when I was sleeping. And yes, men can get a boner when asleep too. I woke up during the event, obviously confused, and just went with it, before falling asleep again. I only understood what even really happened much much later in life.

Maybe it helps with understanding when you think of examples of female rape that isn’t a stranger beating up a woman in a dark alley.

Like Harvey Weinstein. Countless women have come forward about rape and sexual violence from him. I doubt he always used physical violence on these women. But he was this all powerful person in the filmindustry who could and would destroy lives and careers with a wave of his hand if you’d deny him.

Very often rape and sexual violence comes out of a power dynamic where the victim (no matter the gender) feels they don’t have a choice. Physical violence does not have to be involved.

I remember one guy telling his story that he was raped by a pregnant woman. He didn’t want to hurt the baby so he couldn’t force her to stop.

Erections are a biological response to stimulus, desire is not required.

For example a man could be overpowered, tied-up, and teased manually until erect. This is only one possibility but there are many other ways

Also penetration doesn’t need to happen for it to still be considered rape.

There are a few misconceptions in your logic.

1. Force is required to rape
2. Erections are controllable

Both of them are easy to disprove, but not obvious at first sight.

For 1 consider any case where a woman might have power (not physical) over a man, e.g. blackmail, teacher, parole officer, boss, etc. Another possibility to remember are weapons or physical threats to a third party. Also you should remember that humans have a fight/flight/freeze response, so a third of humans would just freeze regardless of being able to overpower their attacker. Finally there’s also the possibility of even without any threat, even being able to think properly, and knowing that he could physically overpower a female attacker, a man might not do it for fear of legal or moral repercussions, e.g. being thought not to hit girls or believing that no one would believe that he was defending himself. In fact lots of women who get raped don’t try to fight back or escape, believing (sometimes accurately) that their attacker would worsen the offense if they did that, e.g. by killing them (even if no threat was made), it’s not uncommon for rape victims to feel ashamed and guilt about not having fought back, and by saying that men can’t get raped because they could theoretically overpower their attacker you’re indirectly saying that any woman who doesn’t fight back with all her might is not being raped either, because they could have overpowered their attacker of they tried.

For 2, erections (and even ejaculation) are physical responses, in fact you can make a corpse get a hard on and cum (some wives do it to preserve their husbands sperm). This is no different from women getting wet or having orgasms while being raped (both of which are common), it means nothing, it’s just a physical reaction to a physical stimulus. In fact lots of victims (both men and women), especially those in abusive relationships think they deserve that because of those physiological reactions. To put it in simpler terms, saying a men can’t be raped because if they got an erection it means they wanted it is like saying that people can’t be stabbed because if they bled is because they wanted the knife.

Women inflict violence by proxy. So she just threatens to get one of her male acquaintances to harm you. This is also why women on male violence appears so much lower then male on woman violence. That and the fact that society is very incredulous and dismissive of male victims of female violence.

From my viewpoint, it’s usually more of a coercive thing. Something you’re not necessarily entirely opposed to, but you might rather not, and in order to avoid a situation you might perceive as bad in a different way, you relent and allow it to happen, leading to years of questioning whether it even was rape or not, even though what it does to you mentally is irrefutable.

I think most female to male abuse comes in the form of emotional coercion. So, something like, if the guy doesn’t have sex with her how she wants, there will be consequences. Sometimes they’re explicit, such as when she actually says it openly. Other times, she communicates it implicitly for plausible deniability. For example, every time a guy is not interested in the moment, she does something that hurts him soon after. This could be from throwing a fit about some regular chore, to shaming them to their friends, to actively seeking attention from or cheating with other men.

I knew a girl that would tell everyone she was being abused before her boyfriend even knew it was happening. She would ask everyone to not say anything because she was scared he would abuse her more. She would also do things to make him angry in public so people would think he had an anger problem. People would start treating the boyfriend like shit, so he would start being isolated, which allowed her to abuse him more. If the boyfriend came out seeking help, no one would believe him and gaslight him further. The girl even went as far as telling relationship therapists that he was abusing her so that he had no escape while she now how documentation that he was abusing her. The girl was a completely deranged psychopath that did this with all her boyfriends. Of course, her friends were similar. One of her friend’s boyfriends committed suicide after they had an argument. The girl then milked that for pity points every chance she got.

I really advise everyone to learn about relationship abuse and vulnerable narcissists. They’re incredibly sneaky and brutally perverse, and anyone can fall for one. It takes a while for even trained relationship abuse therapists to catch on to them. Look it up on YouTube. There are many therapists and survivors that share their stories and guidance.

Bear in mind that in most countries rape is defined by a forced sexual act by a male.

It happens when your girlfriend is extremely unstable by default, even more so after a fight, comes to your parents house drunk in the middle of the night and essentially shames you for trying to reject her advances while simultaneously being physical about it by forcing you down and assuming you’re playing some mind game while you try your best to avoid waking your parents in the next room and making a scene cause she’s being loud and borderline belligerent. The sheer embarassment is enough for personal boundaries to get absolutely stomped on in that situation.

Life is living among infinite shades of grey. Every situation has nuance that you might not have thought of.

Usually it’ll be something like,

“If you try to put up a fight I’ll scream, guess who everyone’s gonna believe?”

Or if you’re really unlucky,

“Be my baby’s daddy!”, suddenly locks legs like a vise and begins grinding like there’s no tomorrow

With girl on guy it’s a lot less about physical overpowering and a lot more about weaponized social biases or lying about the intent of consensual sex for the purpose of trapping them into something.

If you’ve seen the infamous “Female Dating Strategy” forums, a lot of “tricks and tips” they come out with to “lock down your man” or “make him commit already!” basically amount to some form of Girl on Guy SA, either socially blackmailing them with the fear of you dragging them into a public accusation, which they aren’t ever gonna recover from even if found completely innocent, or by sabotaging contraceptives or tricking him into finishing inside to make a baby on purpose and then trying to shotgun wedding the whole thing.

She sucks him gets him hard and then climbs on. He’s too drunk to resist.