I just bought a skateboard and I’m going to head to the skate park, alone. So I would say one tip (of many) is don’t limit yourself to social stigmas and have fun!
Find your thing.
For me that’s been different things as I’ve gone through life. Currently in my 50s and enjoying riding a motorbike at weekends. When I’d ridden all the local roads so many times it was starting to get boring, I added another layer and am now riding my bike to every Village in my county. It’s going to take a while, but has given another layer of interest and purpose. Many people won’t understand why it’s interesting to me, and that’s fine, they don’t have to. Finding what works for you is half the challenge.
BTW, if you’ve got depression, then finding happiness without resolving that is really, really difficult. Been there and absolutely everything felt bleak and pointless. Fixing that is the first step.
Contentment is easier to find than happiness
I don’t chase a big paycheck. I live meagerly, and save, but live comfortably. As they say, “love what you do and you’ll never work a day in your life.”
Good friends, core friends. Good memories. Doing good things, helping. Toss in a cup of stability and a couple hobbies. If you’re practicing or just recently discovered practicing adhd, another dozen hobbies and a therapist/counselor.
What is the difference between good friends and core friends?
No real difference, all groups are different in their own way. The core group, the group around that core. Some say best friends.
XIV (14): Temperance: experienced vast extremes and, as such, has grown to appreciate moderation. He also knows that the good things in life must be waited for and that patience is a key part of a harmonious life. https://www.mysticsense.com/articles/tarot/fools-journey/
The fools journey is the story of the tarot deck and experiences we have in life. It’s meant to be a guide through life’s struggles, it sounds like you could use this at this point in your life.
A table, a chair, a bowl of fruit and a violin; what else does a man need to be happy.
Albert Einstein
For me it’s about pursuing hobbies and having new experiences. I really enjoy developing new skills and seeing myself improve, and doing things I haven’t done before.
by not trying to compare themselves to anyone else
Outdoor hobbies. I’ve got really into foraging, which has multiple benefits, I get to be outside, I get exercise, I learn new things which stimulates my brain, and if I’m lucky I also get free food (which is usually superior in taste and nutrition to store bought). I combine it with hiking, fishing, geocaching etc and if I’m alone I sometimes listen to music on my headphones. Once you start developing outdoor hobbies it’s like you unlock an insanely intricate open world video game.
I just recently quit my job and it’s got me thinking about app development around this idea.
It’s simple, really. Just don’t search for it. Cherish the little things
Purpose.
smells are effervescent and seem to be very impactful… anecdotal evidence only
I find joy from creation. For a long time (2010s) I barely created anything, just consumed. Now I try to do a lot of different things. 3D modelling, game creation, music composing, writing, coding. My skill level doesn’t matter, as I am not dependent on these skills as a source of income (apart from coding to some extent), and the lower my skill, the easier it is to take some big leaps doing these activities, and that progress can yield happiness. I like having several different things as well, as if I lose motivation for one thing, I am not stuck between having nothing to do and forcing myself to do something I don’t really want to.
The other thing is nature. Slowing down and walking in the forest, in the mountains etc. Listening to a waterfall, to the birds etc. Fresh air. Good stuff.
Recognizing how my desires are never truly satisfied, and they cause me suffering. How they constantly shift and always want more. In other words I let go of my judgment and accept what I see. That doesn’t mean I don’t judge it at all or don’t change it. It just means I’m not attached to the desire to change things. It’s just a feeling, and I can act on it, but it’s a conscious decision rather than a habit.
