I never had a social life, either romantic or platonic, and I’m wondering if anyone else has gone from 0 social life to an active one past college. Like I wasted college just going to classes and I graduated already. Thoughts?
no, if you had the ability to create one and chose not to.
also no, if you didn’t have the ability, realize that and start working at the reasons why. (in my case it turned out to be autism).
The most difficult part is keeping your privacy respected. Normals will require you congregate on some proprietary, data-thieving platform to participate.
You start a social life many times on your life. The people around you will change many times, and your relationships will change as well.
Don’t feel pushed to start a social life.
Also, it’s a skill you will take time thlo learn and make lots of mistakes, don’t worry, it’s normal.
And don’t look for others approval in general, ota just wrong, but perfectly normal to look for. Still wrong
I feel like the most important thing to take away here is to not feel pushed to have a social life. One city I lived in I had one friend I really considered a friend and the rest were mostly in the background (though fun to hang out with time to time).
For me a social life is enough if I find a single person who is capable of listening and rolls with bouncing ideas off each other.
May or may not apply to OP but zero social life sounds like they’re an introvert.
Mid-20s is honestly the perfect time to start
Maybe at 120’s it is too late, but I wouldn’t be too sure about that.
My most social years were in my 30’s!
Find a hobby you like and look for local groups of people / classes in that hobby. With time you will make personal connections with people in that group.
Could be workouts, activism, trekking, board games, knitting, book club, debates. Anything that does not involve staring at a screen.
When I hear “social life”, “romantic”, and “platonic” right next to each other like that, I think “social life” is code for spitting game. If that’s the case I’ll let you know when I figure it out
It’s totally possible to build a new network of great friends at literally any point in your life! I have moved multiple times over the years to entirely different regions where I knew zero people and I have always eventually found new friends. (I’m also autistic and introverted, so if I can do it, most people probably can.)
Sometimes it might take a while to find the activities you like, and thus the people who share your interests, but they’re out there! If nothing else, it helps to start going on a regular basis to a local bar that hosts live music and just nurse a drink (even a soda if you’re sober) and hang out, you’ll start sussing out the social fabric in the area pretty quick.
Good luck, you can do it!
I used to, when I had fun neighbours my age that I made through an online Buy Nothing group. If you just start indulging in social groups related to your interests, you’re bound to meet people. It’s up to you if you want to socialize more with those people.
Unfortunately, no one will force you to hang out with them (except red flag weirdos), so a lot of the effort needs to come from you. If you get flaked on/deprioritized/ignored/ghosted more than once or twice, that’s the cue to move on and try someone else so you don’t get your hopes up.
Congrats on graduating! And to answer your question: no, it’s not too late. However, fair warning: it does seem to get harder to develop a social life the older you get. But by no means impossible.
no
Too late? No way! Success depends a lot on your expectations and sense of self, so I would encourage you to be in therapy to get those straight. We all need therapy, but now would be a good time for you, before starting a new way of life.
But no way. You are perfectly fine.
Definitely get therapy, everyone should. Also don’t avoid socializing while u work on yourself In therapy, dual path it!
Dude, it’s literally never too late. x3
There’s old people fuck-a-thons in retirement homes for heaven’s sake, lol. And those people are almost a century old.
Get on meetup.com if you aren’t sure what’s out there, but there’s all sorts of fun stuff going on! Meetup is platonic.
Of course you can, it just requires more work. Find a group of like-minded people by joining a evening class; group training; volunteer at an event; etc…
It requires a lot of effort, but it’ll be worth it in the end.
