I have a high IQ and diagnosed as “gifted” by psy at nearly 40.
I won’t argue about IQ and Giftedness having scientific base or not. All I can do is a professional clinical psy told me I am gifted. And what I’ll say is just my way of thinking.
I have a systemic brain. I have very poor memory concerning names, date, etc… but I can remember complex system (basically, what cause create which consequence) really easily.
I also understand problem, and find solutions much faster than most of peoples, I have strong Intuition of things, but I have difficulties explaining how I’ve found the solution. Scientists think it may be related to Myelin. That stuff increase connection speed between neurons, so it makes you think “faster”, but sometime faster than you conscience.
I also wants to give meaning to anything. If I take a nap and hear the wind in the trees, I immediately imagine air molecules traveling and hitting leaves, sound wave propagating and hitting my ears. Wind also blowing the small layer of hotter air near my skin, explaining why it feel cold, etc…
I see object through their functioning, not their usefulness. When I see any new machine, I don’t really care what it does, but more how it does it.
I’m constantly flooded by information, and I’m constantly analyzing everything. Being in a crowed area is exhausting for me, because there are too many stimulus. I’m not going to faint or something, but I think being in a crowd for me is like being in a kindergarten class full of screaming children.
I don’t talk a lot because I’m easily bored by small-talks. I don’t see the point of speaking about what I’ve done this week end, or the weather, or anything. I prefer staying in my own bubble speaking to myself.
I don’t feel part of this world, I more feel like an observer watching some weird TV show. I don’t understand most of human reaction.
If you are French speaking, I strongly encourage you to read the comics Comme oiseau dans bocal. It’s based on serious research and is a very good popular science story about IQ, giftedness, etc…
Since you’ve been to a psychologist for your assessment (is that what you mean by “psy”?) have you asked or considered the possibility of neurodivergence? I have suspected autism in myself for a while, and I resonate with much of what you said in regards to stimulus overwhelm, staying in your bubble, disdain for small talk etc. That’s pretty common in many autistic people.
Yeah, I and some other psychologists had suspected high level autism, like Asperger, but it doesn’t seems to be this. I have a mix of social anxiety linked to my childhood (also called over-adaptation), probably neurodivergence like giftedness, and Endogenous depression. Fuck my brain :D. The good side is that I’m extremely resilient to stress, pressure, or emergency situations.
My last psy (who is excellent) told me that “Autistic people are always autistic”. It’s really a missing social-related circuits in their brain. On my side, I’m “autistic like” most of the time, but I manage to build close relationship with good friends. So I have this “social circuit”, but it switch on only when I feel really secure.
It feel really strange to re-analyse all my life and childhood with this new perspective.
Yes, a lot >_<, but I have calmed down since a few year. I’ve learned to step back from things on which you don’t have control.
Actually, it’s not that I don’t feel anything. It’s even the opposite. I feel the same level of stress when I order a pizza than when I present in front of 100 peoples. Being stressed and anxious is a natural state for me since I was a child. That’s what my psy call “over-adaptation”. Normal people grow up by alternate time of danger and time of safety. So they learn to adapt to different situation. On my side, I always felt unsecured while growing up. Any situation were perceived as potential threat. So I over-adapted.
Also, some things affects me more than “normal” people. I have very low tolerance to injustice, which bring me trouble in my previous job btw. I’m also nearly unable to lie, honesty is primordial for me. At least, my wife is sure I’ll never cheat on her xD.
I can also have important emotional reactions caused by little things. It seems like, as connections are faster in my brain, information coming from Amygdala (which basically handle emotions) go too fast through Cerebral cortex (which handle logic). As a consequence, Cortex doesn’t have time to filter them.
In the end, like everyone, I’m a mix of nature, my brain is wire differently than most of people, which gave me high IQ, and nurture, because of environment in which I grew up, which gave me social anxiety.
I have a high IQ and diagnosed as “gifted” by psy at nearly 40.
I won’t argue about IQ and Giftedness having scientific base or not. All I can do is a professional clinical psy told me I am gifted. And what I’ll say is just my way of thinking.
I have a systemic brain. I have very poor memory concerning names, date, etc… but I can remember complex system (basically, what cause create which consequence) really easily. I also understand problem, and find solutions much faster than most of peoples, I have strong Intuition of things, but I have difficulties explaining how I’ve found the solution. Scientists think it may be related to Myelin. That stuff increase connection speed between neurons, so it makes you think “faster”, but sometime faster than you conscience.
I also wants to give meaning to anything. If I take a nap and hear the wind in the trees, I immediately imagine air molecules traveling and hitting leaves, sound wave propagating and hitting my ears. Wind also blowing the small layer of hotter air near my skin, explaining why it feel cold, etc…
I see object through their functioning, not their usefulness. When I see any new machine, I don’t really care what it does, but more how it does it.
I’m constantly flooded by information, and I’m constantly analyzing everything. Being in a crowed area is exhausting for me, because there are too many stimulus. I’m not going to faint or something, but I think being in a crowd for me is like being in a kindergarten class full of screaming children.
I don’t talk a lot because I’m easily bored by small-talks. I don’t see the point of speaking about what I’ve done this week end, or the weather, or anything. I prefer staying in my own bubble speaking to myself.
I don’t feel part of this world, I more feel like an observer watching some weird TV show. I don’t understand most of human reaction.
If you are French speaking, I strongly encourage you to read the comics Comme oiseau dans bocal. It’s based on serious research and is a very good popular science story about IQ, giftedness, etc…
Since you’ve been to a psychologist for your assessment (is that what you mean by “psy”?) have you asked or considered the possibility of neurodivergence? I have suspected autism in myself for a while, and I resonate with much of what you said in regards to stimulus overwhelm, staying in your bubble, disdain for small talk etc. That’s pretty common in many autistic people.
Yeah, I and some other psychologists had suspected high level autism, like Asperger, but it doesn’t seems to be this. I have a mix of social anxiety linked to my childhood (also called over-adaptation), probably neurodivergence like giftedness, and Endogenous depression. Fuck my brain :D. The good side is that I’m extremely resilient to stress, pressure, or emergency situations.
My last psy (who is excellent) told me that “Autistic people are always autistic”. It’s really a missing social-related circuits in their brain. On my side, I’m “autistic like” most of the time, but I manage to build close relationship with good friends. So I have this “social circuit”, but it switch on only when I feel really secure.
It feel really strange to re-analyse all my life and childhood with this new perspective.
Well fuck me damn. Do you experience anger?
Yes, a lot >_<, but I have calmed down since a few year. I’ve learned to step back from things on which you don’t have control.
Actually, it’s not that I don’t feel anything. It’s even the opposite. I feel the same level of stress when I order a pizza than when I present in front of 100 peoples. Being stressed and anxious is a natural state for me since I was a child. That’s what my psy call “over-adaptation”. Normal people grow up by alternate time of danger and time of safety. So they learn to adapt to different situation. On my side, I always felt unsecured while growing up. Any situation were perceived as potential threat. So I over-adapted.
Also, some things affects me more than “normal” people. I have very low tolerance to injustice, which bring me trouble in my previous job btw. I’m also nearly unable to lie, honesty is primordial for me. At least, my wife is sure I’ll never cheat on her xD. I can also have important emotional reactions caused by little things. It seems like, as connections are faster in my brain, information coming from Amygdala (which basically handle emotions) go too fast through Cerebral cortex (which handle logic). As a consequence, Cortex doesn’t have time to filter them.
In the end, like everyone, I’m a mix of nature, my brain is wire differently than most of people, which gave me high IQ, and nurture, because of environment in which I grew up, which gave me social anxiety.
Thank you for taking the time to write it all down.
Just wanted to say wow, so much of that sounds familiar!
thanks :)