(Okay I know I ask questions about family-topics a lot, so please forgive me if these get too annoying lol)
I remember when I was 8-12, I’d cuddle with mom a lot… I acted so childish…
I don’t remember my older brother ever cuddling with my mom… (for context: I’m also male, so it’s not a gender stereotype thing) My brother is 5 years older… but I don’t remember him ever being as clingy as I did when during at the same age.
I did this thing where I slept with my parents in their bed… yes I know very childish
I just feel really clingy and desired that parental protection a lot.
So like… even sometimes like when I was 13 or so, I sometimes still did that thing where I just went to my parents room and sleep in their bed… less often… but it’s often enough its in my memories. Like its a vibe thing. Somtimes I feel like yeah I wanna be left alone pls, then sometimes I feel like mama/baba I don’t wanna be left alone
And like I remember doing that during my middle school years…
I think in highschool, it became much much rarer. Only like once every few months or so
Don’t actually remember too much, memory is kinda blurry
Okay sorry if y’all cringe at me, but this is why I don’t feel very masculine for a male lol.
I feel like I’ve never really mentally grown up. Still don’t feel grown up.
And then my parents are shocked that I’m not ready to do adult stuff lol
Oh yea no drivers license :/ (working on it)
Sometimes I watch videos of adults with developmental disabilities and I’m like… damn why do I feel 50% like that sometimes?
I can kinda relate to stories of young adults with Autism Spectrums Disorders… well I don’t have a diagnosis and I probably do not have it, but I can relate to feeling similarly…
Like going to a store my byself is…
oh my god I just realized
I don’t even do that too often…
So… I get anxiety being in a store by myself…
I remember frequently when I was 15-20, if my parent were out of my sight for too long… I’d be in a smei-panic like… have they abandoned me? especially scary since I had no financial means to support myself… still sometimes feel this way…
Jeez why do I sound like I have a developmental disability or something… wait a minute… do I? 🤔
There’s a thing called Birth Order theory and it may or may not be bullshit and subject to cognitive bias, but I will say that anecdotally it seems mostly accurate when I think of my group of friends growing up and their siblings. There are definitely some exceptions though, like my friend who is the younger brother, but is more responsible than his big bro, though we suspect the older brother suffers from some sort of undiagnosed mental illness and is unwilling to get checked out. Short answer in my opinion is yes, the older sibling tends to mature faster. I do think that the older sibling has some power over the younger ones by virtue of being older and more mentally developed while growing up. Whether they use that to nurture and protect, or abuse the younger sibling is more a matter of personality than birth order though.
For your second question about feeling immature, I think it can happen to anyone at any time. Being put in a tough situation and feeling helpless about it can make a grown person feel like a child, despite being an otherwise mature adult. For me it happened less the more I became independent. But it still happens. For example, if car issues pop up I can get the feeling of “oh shit, I need an adult”. I think personality is a big factor here too. As an only child my perception is that I feel less willing to ask for help than others, at least until I try to find a solution myself. Some friends who were younger siblings seemed to always be getting catered to, getting rides to places, etc. That might also be influenced by other factors like family’s finances.