Ironically, it was pretty much the opposite of my experience. My diagnosis was the first time I’ve ever felt fundamentally broken in a way that can’t be fixed, because I’d spent my life believing that if I got serious about it, I could do the things. It made me realise that it doesn’t matter how serious I get, it’s not going away.
But with time, even though that’s still true, the scale to which I was catastrophying it was over blown.
Ironically, it was pretty much the opposite of my experience. My diagnosis was the first time I’ve ever felt fundamentally broken in a way that can’t be fixed, because I’d spent my life believing that if I got serious about it, I could do the things. It made me realise that it doesn’t matter how serious I get, it’s not going away.
But with time, even though that’s still true, the scale to which I was catastrophying it was over blown.
Sorry to hear that, for me accepting the fact that those expectations are not real has helped a lot. But still it feels awful!
I had a similar experience when I got diagnosed, wound up drinking quite heavily for a while immediately after it.