You shit yourself every time someone says something dumb on the internet
That actually would kill someone from violent diarrhea. Lol
Every bedsheet you ever buy will get terrible pilling within a month (even the expensive ones!)
So cruel! I like it.
Oh not the pilling!!
NSFW: The latest Oglaf is relevant: https://www.oglaf.com/flypaper/
Your socks will never feel dry again.
Just one sock. And it switches when you start to get used to it, like a plugged nostril.
Hey! I wanted to say this. 😡
To me? 😦
No, just to all the cursed people.
May your taint be rubbed raw every time you exercise, no matter how well manicured it may be.
An arch cramp for 2 minutes every day at a random time.
You mean this spasm pain in the foot? Damn, they are annoying!
or a jaw cramp.
Ideally while you need to explain something important
Ooof. Or that thing in your chin just under your tongue.
yup, that’s the one!
I hate those cramps. They are the worst
May one shoelace be permanently tighter than the other just enough to be annoying.
How does that work for shoes without laces?
They get incurable cancer
Already have it, your curse has failed.
Wow, you are a particular kind of cruel.
You fart uncontrollably for 30 seconds whenever you see someone you find attractive
Every liquid product that you try use (glue, shampoo, toothpaste, etc) will be clogged with the dried product requiring a small pick to clear the clog before use.
All of their drawers are missing the thing that keeps them from pulling all the way out so they end up yanking the drawer all the way out every time
Mine never had those anyway. It’s not at all bad once you expect it.
Just be annoyingly cute and nice to them. Like, exrremely.
And what to do with all unicorn blood that’s soon to spoil? Just gift it to them? I don’t think they’d feel it’s a nice gesture it is.
I hope you step on a lego block
That is violent…very violent
May flies regularly fly past you next to your ear.
May your butthole itch after every shower
May you have to take a donkey dump 10 minutes after every shower.
Oh shit I’ve been living under this one.
May every shirt you wear have an itchy tag you can’t remove.
