The Last game I played was Splatoon 3. It really depends on a few things, Am I an Inkling/Octoling? Do I speak the language? Where am I? In Splatoon lore all humans died in mass floods, so if I was still human I would probably be studied. Also, if I’m in the middle of the ocean I would be screwed either way. Assuming that I am in a major city or at least near civilization, and I am an Inkling/Octoling, and I speak the language, I would be fine. As for what I would do, I would sign up to work at Grizco, and once I have enough money buy a gun and participate in turf wars to gain money, eventually buying an appartment.
No no no, I’d rather not be a three dimensional human in the world of Paper Mario. Bro turns into airplanes and boats. If they fold me like that, I’m in for a painful and uncharacteristic death in that game.