Preferably in real life and without religion or alcohol.
I found one in community dance, specifically local folk dance. The median age is probably 65, so it’s adaptable to a wide range of athleticism levels, but it does require significant mobility.
I absolutely loved it until covid, and then I moved, but it was a wonderful group of people through whom I met dear friends, found a job offer, learned a bunch of things, and found a home.
Pretending you enjoy normie stuff like star wars or Axe throwing.
You may even find you… enjoy it. 😱
Look for a niche
Sports/music
Join a club
You don’t. Simple as that
Hey, I’ve seen you around before.
Perhaps it’s a bit nosy of me, and of course I don’t fully know what you’re going through, but I know there’s a real person on the other side suffering, and that’s the only thing that matters to me.
So I wanted to say that I’m thinking about you and I care about you. You have intrinsic worth no matter what anyone says. Even if you can’t find anyone to talk to in real life. Even if you get a bazillion downvotes and hateful comments on the Internet. It doesn’t change that fact one bit.
I remember years ago when I was in a really painful headspace, I would project my internal cynicism and attract negative attention on purpose in order to make other people affirm my self-hatred and belief that I deserved to suffer.
But I was hyperfocused on the negativity. I ignored the caring people who were concerned about me because it didn’t support my internal narrative that everyone hated me and therefore I should hate myself too. I found comfort in hopelessness because it meant that I didn’t have to be vulnerable anymore. I told myself that a bad outcome was guaranteed and therefore it’s never worth opening up or reaching out.
Most people who feel for you won’t speak up. That’s one of the reasons I believed nobody cared about me: I couldn’t see the evidence. People have to step up and be part of the evidence, so I might as well be one of them. Real life evidence is worth a lot more than Internet comments, but if my words have even a chance of helping you in some way, then writing this all out was completely worth it.
The single most healing moment in my life is when someone in real life offered to be that person for me, and she told me all of the things that she genuinely liked about me. I was an emotional wreck; I avoided talking to anyone, was woefully insecure, and felt like nobody could ever like me. She knew all of these things and chose to talk to me anyway. Her compliments canceled out all of the insults and rejections I had ever received and made me confident in myself for the first time. I have hope you can meet someone like that too. Mine showed up when I least expected it!
So maybe it’s none of my business, and maybe many of the things I said don’t apply to your situation, but I want to make it absolutely clear that, whoever you are, I care about you, and many other people do too. You deserve love, healing, and support. And I truly wish the best for you.
Hugs~
Great message my friend.
Lemmy, but you never leave the house, society, but you never spend time at home.
Meetup has helped - especially around RPGs and board games. Having a weekly group of friends meeting up with a shared topic helps.
A fellow Belle of the Ranch viewer in the wild, wonderful ✨️
Local ttrpg store
Meet up has a lot of groups with a variety of activities. You can find hiking, biking, swimming, reading, knitting, quilting, art of various forms, board game, DND, video game, canoeing, kayaking, trivia night, yoga, meditation, foodie, singles, couples, and ither groups to be part of.
Get involved with something that requires a community.
Sounds stupid, but there’s plenty of things that require groups of people to be possible. Community sports, political activism, board games and cards, etc. typically have easy to join communities created for the express purporse of doing the one thing.
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In the meantime !dull_mens_club@lemmy.world
board game cafes!
Scouting helped me a lot with this. It’s an active community, and not just for kids. And it’s worldwide, so wherever you go, there’s a community you can visit, or recognize
If you don’t mind me asking, how old are you and did you consistently do Scouting from child/teenhood to recently?
Been playing with the idea of Rovers, I just don’t know what that’d be like as an adult out of Scouting for many years who’s lost most of their outdoor experience.
Edit: Not Rovers I guess, the one that takes people over 26. Edit edit: I thought this was a thing but I guess isn’t, though some Googling suggests there’s something in the works topping out at 30ish.
