My friend thought she was having a seizure. She was not having a seizure. She was just restless and very high and saying “I’m having a seizure” until she made me call an ambulance.

They didn’t even have their sirens on.

Bonus: When I got too high, I was confused in how we knew dinosaurs didn’t have their own civilization before the meteor hit and would not let it go for a bit.

Brenda.

One night while tripping on acid me and my then friend noticed smoke bellowing out of a medical center and mistakenly thought it was on fire. We called 911 and left an tip but wanted to stay anonymous and get on with our night. The next day I realized that the smoke was coming from a chimney built into the center and felt dumb but I guess its better safe and sorry.

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My little brother came home drunk once when he was about 17 or 18 and he was hardly able to walk. I had to help him go into the bathroom because he felt sick. Then he literally hugged the toilet for about half an hour.

Nice try FBI

The first time I went to a 4/20 party, my friends and I got so high, when we played this trivia game that was on DIRECT TV, we kept trying to answer the commercials that played between the question and answer parts and thought we were just dumb as fuck when every answer was SUPER wrong.

Shit myself in the endagine maccas.

My now-ex who was always horrible at handling their liquor got way too drunk while we were out at the bars in the city. We had to take a 45-min train ride back to the house we were renting during our vacation, where some of my extended family were also staying.

Ex could barely stay conscious during the train ride, then suddenly gets down on the floor and says they’re gonna hurl. Luckily I had a plastic bag with me and they threw up in that, but it was a small bag, plus everyone on the train was understandably grossed out, so I make them get up and move to the bathroom at the end of the train (thank God there was one). I distinctly remember a woman grabbing the hand of her small child and pulling them away as she looked on in disgust.

I lock us in the bathroom and Ex throws up in the toilet the entire rest of the train ride. Finally we get to our stop and we have to wait until the very last minute to get off the train because Ex doesn’t want to leave the bathroom. Right as we step off the train, it starts moving again to go back to the city.

My cousin picks us up from the train station in their very nice/expensive SUV, and the whole ride back to the house I’m cursing Ex out saying don’t you dare throw up in this nice car. We get to the house without incident but I have to drag them up the stairs to the bedroom, get a trashcan under them just in time because they started throwing up again, then monitor them the rest of the night to make sure they don’t pass out and choke on their own vomit.

The next morning Ex says they’re so sorry and will “make it up to me”, and one of the things they offer for this is to “clean the whole apartment when we get home”, as though that’s normally MY responsibility?? I was pissed at them for weeks for embarrassing me in public and to my extended family (it was the first time they’d met). Such a fucking idiot. One of so many reasons they’re now my ex.

Finally

One of my 30+ year old forever-alone friends always makes a complete clown of himself when he’s drunk and there’s women around. He thinks he’s funny and good singer but he’s not. Just extremely cringe to be around. On several occasions I have told him while sober that alcohol makes him a completely different person but he doesn’t seem to get the hint.

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I woke up (from a blackout) on the hood of a car. A car that was stopped at a red light and wasn’t the car my friends were driving. I guess I leapt out of the backseat and rolled around on their hood? Idk, I blacked out again then came-to again rolling through some wet grass. Blacked out again and woke up on a couch.

Turns out that humans can teleport.

Want more details? Me too. But I have no idea. It was more than two decades ago and I no longer drink.

Not exactly drunk or on drugs, but given nitrous oxide while having a cavity filled when I was younger I started to think I was drowning on my own saliva because I couldn’t swallow and they weren’t using the suction thing to clear it out. I started thrashing and flailing about, effectively slapping the dentist.

I became unruly at a party. Pretty sure my drink was spiked. My girlfriend at the time dragged me off. Apparently I faceplanted in her apartment trying to take my shoes off while sitting on her bed. Woke up to a big carpet burn on my forehead. It hurt like hell and I was mortified.

Drunk: brazenly hitting on a lesbian who was holding hands with her partner

High: one time at the dentist, they gave me anesthesia prior to oral surgery (remember to brush & floss, kids). I was high enough that I thought they were going to give me a boob job instead of a root canal. Because I was high as a kite, I couldn’t really move or communicate, so I just went in & out of consciousness. This was a dozen or so years ago, and I just remember being confused the rest of the day about it.