For anyone that doesn’t know about Death Note it’s a fictional notebook from a death god. If you write someone’s name in it while picturing thier face they die. You can also manipulate thier actions and method of death to some extent.
Donald J. Trump - Death by french fry asphyxiation on live TV
DJ Vance - Killed by a falling piece of furniture
Elon Musk - Hit by a Cybertruck in a freak accident
Pete Hegseth - Alcohol poisoning
Robert F Kennedy Jr. - Brain aneurysm live on TV
Kash Patel - shot by an unknown professional hitman
Christy Noem - Hit by a speeding dump truck
Pam Bondi - Electrocuted by a faulty power line near her podium (live, of course)
Linda McMahon - Stone Cold Stunner by a J6’er
Marco Rubio - Smashes face through a plate glass window
Elise Stefanik - Falls out a window
Vladimir Putin - Poisoned by comrade
Benjamin Netanyahu - Islamic extremist knife attack
Kim Jong-un - Slips and falls down some stairs, breaking his neck
Xi Jinpeng - Exposure to toxic honey
I could go on and on, you get the idea…
This guy death notes
Except for the names he spelled wrong. Some unrelated people will die.
Not if they’re picturing the correct person. Writing the wrong name but picturing the correct person will result in no death so as to keep the innocent or same-name people alive. It’s in the rules.
Makes me wonder what would happen with JD Vance, actually. His last name has changed a couple of times, which of his names is the “real” one?
It needs to be his legal name. That’s also addressed in Death Note, where the lead investigator goes by a moniker “L” and can’t be targeted by the Death Note until after Light learns L’s real legal name. Nicknames or incomplete names aren’t enough.
Think you need to have the person face in your mind when writing it so even if people share the name only the one you think about would die.
I see someone read the rules correctly!
This list, but everything would be “spontaneous combustion” and happen at the same time.
Let it be an event to behold.
Yeah, to actually affect any real change, it needs to send a message. While freak accidents would make for great memes, they don’t send the “this is a warning; nobody is untouchable. You could be next if you don’t clean up your act” message that will actually cause lasting change.
Freak accidents can be hand waved away. Conspiracy theorists would go wild, but the ruling elites wouldn’t actually change anything. You want something that can’t be explained away as anything but a targeted and coordinated attack.
If you want to send a message, maybe have them all simultaneously choke on a 50 cent coin. It’s common enough that anyone can get their hands on one, but uncommon enough that you basically need to seek them out. That would at least send a “money bad” message. But be sure it’s something consistent, to ensure the message is actually received.
Interesting that only one item on your list would start a war. Guess you didn’t see enough photos of dead children last year.
Care to elaborate which of these murderers you’re referring to? Besides, I’m making a global omelette here. Expect broken eggs.
Elon Musk - Hit by a Cybertruck in a freak accident
Christy Noem - Driving a Cybertruck that hit Elon Musk in a freak accident
Pam Bondi - Electrocuted by a faulty Cybertruck that was just in a freak accident
FTFY
Like Snatch
This is beautiful.
For some unknowable reason, I am reminded of this exchange in an X-Files episode about a psychic who could supposedly predict people’s deaths.
Psychic: You know, there are worse ways to go, but I can’t think of a more undignified one than autoerotic asphyxiation.
Mulder: Why are you telling me that?
He just got the wrong David, and was thinking of Carradine.
This DJ Vance guy sounds dope. Which clubs is he at?
Strongly disagree with the Netanyahu one. It would make him a martyr and create more problems than it fixes.
Just replace islamic with zionist and you’re good
You know, you’re absolutely right.
They’d still try to blame Islamic people somehow. Like how all the Jan 6ers were somehow antifa
RIP DJ Vance, poor innocent bystander got got for no reason
Robert F Kennedy Jr. - Brain aneurysm live on TV
This is absolutely a terrible one.
He should go by polio.
By Death Note rules, it could take too long and revert to a heart attack.
You’re hired!
I’d put Putin and Netanyahu above Trump. Let the hard right see it coming. They would believe it was a coincidence, continue on with Musk. Let them see the circle tighten. Hit Kim Jong-un and Xi to let them know it’s not a Western thing.
Roll on with the AfD actors, Nazis be damned. Still not cluing in? Start with the remainder of your list, roll.
Can we do a mass hit on the January 6th rebels? No? OK. Start with Henry “Enrique” Tarrio, 39, of Miami, Florida. And never stop until… Every. Last. Motherfucking. One. Of. Them. Is. Dead.
Spare Trump. Leave him shaking in his high-heeled loafers. Let him live in FEAR.
Haha, this was in no particular order. I mean, if I had Dragonball powers, I’d be razing the entire fucking planet right now.
This is quite psychotic.
Write my name in it so I don’t forget it’s mine
Nice try FBI
I don’t know anything about this ‘death note’. All I know is that people drown in their own bath tubs every day. Even rich and powerful people.
Also they added me to their will for some reason… Weird.
The first name I write down is my own. For I know what I will do with it, and I know that while I would start with the notion of doing only what i feel must I know i will grow corrupt. On the first page I will write detailed instructions disposing of this book, and then I will sign it, knowing I have literally signed my own death warrant, hoping that my will would be carried out that the book would be encased in a block of cement and buried deep.
Then I will start writing names.
And keep writing names.
Until that last day.
There are many in this world I would see removed from it For my niece’s sake. For all our sakes…
There would be no statements. No declarations. There would simply be. Murder, for that is what this is. me deciding that others should be denied their lives. Maybe the world improves with them removed from it. Hard to say. I clearly believe so given what I would be doing.
You don’t need to hide the book right before you die. The shinigami it belongs to will take it back and presumably leave. They might stick around to give it to someone else but that’s their choice and nothing to worry about in your upcoming purgatory. Even if you did cement it and bury it where no human will ever find it, the shinigami can just phase through and grab it any time.
Well that is their affair. I am simply ensuri ng people can’t get to it between now and then.
This wouldn’t stop future assholes.
No, but there is a limit to what any mortal man could do. I could become a tyrant, but as kira learned. that has limits and i do not live in a world where people would fall over themselves to make mistakes in my favor.
I would do what I could, and then stare the shinigami in the eye as the hourglass runs out.
I would also do what i could but i find it depressing that, honestly, this is what we (humans) are. Greed is deep in our core and i don’t think we will ever beat it.
A man will betray a thousand of his own kin to get ahead of everyone else and another would do the same just to lick his boots.
🫡
Kira’s downfall was his ego. So the user of the Death Note should be a selfless person, thinking about what the impact of this tool is on humanity and whether it can be used (and if so, how) for the betterment of humanity.
There are a number of ways…
You didn’t answer the question.
You find the death note. What do you do next?
I never said I was free from a flawed ego. I might test out the name of a personal enemy, someone whose death I would hear about but not someone who would be on the news. Then, from there, it’d be easy to wield a strong sense of justice against those who have committed irrevocable harms and have gotten away with it.
Pull an epic prank and make it look like a guest book somewhere.
Dozens of people die
“It’s just a prank, bro!”
My b. “Social Experiment”
Put it on the shelf with the other one
Many who live deserve death. Many who have died deserve life. Can you give it to them? Do not be so eager to deal out death in judgment.
I’d put it in a box and drop it in a river.
“Some ask what right do i have kill them, those that know their nature will ask, what right do I have to let them live?”
Some people are just legit evil. Ever see drowning Moana? Whole town celebrated her death.
Throwing that away would risk someone unhinged like Light gets it. Better someone who isn’t getting off to being a god on borrowed powers.
Yeah but I’m also pretty sure Gandalf was down with killing Sauron
I’ve got some research to do and some very thoughtful application of this powerful, dangerous tool. I know where I’m starting though. In Minecraft.
The world could legitimately be made so much better
Just don’t lose sight of the goals. Light was a cautionary tale.
Burn it. Sure there are people that need to die but I don’t want any risk anyone else gets access to this even at the expense of letting evil people live.
Elon Musk, death from asphyxiation being up Trumps ass for too long.
Followed by Trump, death from rectal bleeding.
It would all be on live television.
deleted by creator
Performative art. They would be on stage at the next clan rally and say look at this and both be willing participants in the head up ass shoving process.
Followed by RFKJ with a juxtaposition of TB, polio, measles, smallpox, and food poisoning from raw milk.
“How did he die?”
“Believe it or not, every single preventable illness you can imagine. It’s the damnedest thing.”
The reverse Monty Burns
Write my name in the book. You’re welcome world!
remember you get to say how you die and I always wanted to be sexed to death by a group of beautiful women.
The Death Note doesn’t control the actions of anybody except the people named in the note, and if the condition cannot be fulfilled then they simply die of a heart attack.
So you’d have to be a truly terrible person to make that one happen.
You can write yourself into the state of doing it man, you can write that you think of nothing but this goal for months on end before you finally figure out the means.
I guess you could then infer my comment to mean that they were the type of person who wouldn’t be able to achieve such a goal, even with your conditions.
Certainly I wouldn’t be the sort to write such a comment!
BTW IIRC, the Death Note can only control people’s actions for a limited time. Something like 20 or 24 days.
Idk, some of the planning when light kills the FBI agents seemed to be pretty elaborate, I’m sure there’s a time limit, but I don’t remember how long.
I mean even if the note did control people wouldn’t you still be a truly terrible person?
Idk. A magic death god notebook is pretty high concept
Death by snu-snu got taken
Eh fuck it. “*”. Kill everyone I can picture people so idk worth a shot?
