Oh I still have this, I’m just better at powering through now. My siblings had no issues. Shout to be heard type of household, and I cant shout very well.
Didnt help that my mother has a meandering way of talking and thinking:
e.g. “tetris, I want you to do something for me, remember that curtain rail that I got from Argos before it closed down, we went there with Henry’s mum, the one who hurt her shoulder playing tennis, and now Henry’s going to join the army, hopefully not helping the IDF, which by the way did you see the news…”
I now stop her at the first tangent, and kindly state to her “mum, finish your sentence” where she then realises that she’s holding me hostage and then gets to the point
Ah, this is my wife. She almost certainly has ADHD herself and hates being interrupted. I’ve been coaching her to begin with a thesis sentence before giving all the context, and it’s soooo helpful when she remembers.
So, when she wants me to pick up something from a neighbor, instead of: starting with the name of the neighbor, how she knows the neighbor, previous things we’ve picked up from the neighbor, previous things the neighbor has picked up from us, other reasons I might remember the neighbor; and then moving onto what she wants the item I’ll be picking up for; and then asking me if I’ll pick it up; and only at the very end telling me where I’ll be picking it up from;
instead of all that, starting with: “Will you do a pick-up from <address>?” and then give all that context afterwards so I can properly sift the information with an endgoal in mind.
It’s not that I want to skip the rest; I love her voice and hearing her talk, I just get anxious trying to remember everything. If I know in advance what’s important I can focus on that and let the irrelevant slip away.
Oh I still have this, I’m just better at powering through now. My siblings had no issues. Shout to be heard type of household, and I cant shout very well.
Didnt help that my mother has a meandering way of talking and thinking:
e.g. “tetris, I want you to do something for me, remember that curtain rail that I got from Argos before it closed down, we went there with Henry’s mum, the one who hurt her shoulder playing tennis, and now Henry’s going to join the army, hopefully not helping the IDF, which by the way did you see the news…”
I now stop her at the first tangent, and kindly state to her “mum, finish your sentence” where she then realises that she’s holding me hostage and then gets to the point
I see,
ADHD 2 ADHD communication
Absolutely….
When I’m tired, I sound just like their mom, haha. So does my husband.
We both have ADHD 🙃
Ah, this is my wife. She almost certainly has ADHD herself and hates being interrupted. I’ve been coaching her to begin with a thesis sentence before giving all the context, and it’s soooo helpful when she remembers.
what’s a thesis sentence?
So, when she wants me to pick up something from a neighbor, instead of: starting with the name of the neighbor, how she knows the neighbor, previous things we’ve picked up from the neighbor, previous things the neighbor has picked up from us, other reasons I might remember the neighbor; and then moving onto what she wants the item I’ll be picking up for; and then asking me if I’ll pick it up; and only at the very end telling me where I’ll be picking it up from;
instead of all that, starting with: “Will you do a pick-up from <address>?” and then give all that context afterwards so I can properly sift the information with an endgoal in mind.
It’s not that I want to skip the rest; I love her voice and hearing her talk, I just get anxious trying to remember everything. If I know in advance what’s important I can focus on that and let the irrelevant slip away.
oh I see, yeah definitely just give me the summary and then let me tune out the other details haha
I have like…at least three people in my immediate family who are like “So I…uh…went…to…uh…the…uh…repair…uh…shop…uh…”
I don’t wear a watch, but I look at my wrist now to simulate looking at one