• BlameTheAntifa@lemmy.world
    1·
    2 months ago

    I’ll point out that the “Jesus and the fig tree” story is a parable. It’s made fun of a lot, but it’s a vicious lesson by someone who was very theatrical in their teaching style. The fig tree is Israel, who were expected by their god to always be in season and ready for their messiah. But when Jesus arrived, they were not in season, and so were cursed to never bear fruit again. It wasn’t an agricultural misunderstanding, it was a lesson and everything that surrounds it gives it context.

    • shalafi@lemmy.worldEnglish
      1·
      2 months ago

      Asked one of those “Bible is all literal truth” guys one day, “How did Jesus teach?”

      “?”

      “He taught in parables, right? Stories that aren’t true, meant to illustrate a point.”

      “Ok.”

      “Is it possible other Bible stories are parables?”

      “?”

  • MrsDoyle@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
    1·
    2 months ago

    My favourite is the one with Moses coming down with the Big Book of Rules, direct from God. Then getting his pals to kill thousands of his followers for not following the Rules, which presumably they’ve never seen.

    Levites: But doesn’t it say in the Rules…

    Moses: KILL THEM ALL.

    Exodus 32, verse 27

    • prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone
      1·
      2 months ago

      Also, at least two of the rules are basically just “my god is better than your god”

      Getting genocided and wondering who the fuck Yahweh is

  • markovs_gun@lemmy.world
    1·
    2 months ago

    One nitpick- Solomon using demonic assistance to build his Temple is extrabiblical lore. I believe that Solomon’s command over demons might be mentioned in the Talmud, but not in the Bible itself.

    • Skua@kbin.earth
      1·
      2 months ago

      The Seal of Solomon. Solomon’s signet ring, given to him by God, is supposed to have granted him a bunch of supernatural abilities, one of which was the ability to command things like devils and jinns. I think the story is only part of specific mysticist beliefs within the Abrahamic religions and not in any of the main texts, hence the GM having to check their books for it

  • Björn@swg-empire.de
    0·
    2 months ago

    DM: You killed so many people with that donkey bone I think we can stop treating it as an improvised weapon. Here’s a proper statblock.