I’m lasooing the moon closer, so I can climb on and get away from this place.
I work as a slot technician. One of our jobs is moving slot machines with hand trucks. When setting them down, one typically counterbalances the weight of the machine with their body. I wanna get catapulted across the casino floor, fly through the air while screaming like Goofy, and hit the wall leaving a silhouette-shaped hole.
Which, in this economy, seems less like an injury and more a reward.
I’ll start running but build up speed by running in place first. Also that will have a distinct sound effect.
Run out on a branch with a saw and watch the world fall down as I cut through the branch behind me.
Run off a cliff and never look down = flight.
Also have an enemy draw a really cool place on a wall and run through it.
IRL Rocket Jumping.
Probably still gonna hurt, but not anywhere near as much, and my body will not be, you know, liquified/dismembered, just comically singed.
I live in America, so I’m digging a hole lime Bugs Bunny and traveling to anywhere else after taking a wrong turn at Albuquerque.
I’m going to walk off a cliff with my eyes closed and see how far I can get before I fall.
Amazed nobody has said float through the air on the waft of a delicious pie yet
Boing! Boing! Jumping off a roof so I can bounce bounce bounce, I can’t jump for shit IRL and I want to.
Also maybe some NSFW stuff I am not about to detail.
Have you tried a trampoline?
(For the bounce - but also for NSFW stuff I guess…)
Just what kind of cartoon has NSFW cartoon physics? How would that even work?
Hentai
It’s called Cool World, and it’s art.
Ok, totally not going to look that up, haha…
I have a reoccurring dream about that.
Bouncing, that is. Cough, cough…
If it counts, I’d love to have a portable black circle disk thing like in Toontown so I could return home in an instance.
If that doesn’t count, I wouldn’t mind having falls only cause me to accordion and not take much, if any, damage if I land on my feet paws.
But the glock just makes clean, non-bleeding holes.
Didn’t think of that. And now I’m left wondering what the next best thing would be, besides something like maybe a metal bat or pipe.
Shredder/paint thinner?
Phone call someone and during the split screen physically jump into their side of the call.
I’m gonna sneak up behind you, and…
MEEP! MEEP!
What’s stopping you from doing that anyway?
Sticking my finger in the barrel of a cops gun so it blows up in their face.
Then a large boxing glove pops out of the flower on my chest, and knocks the fucker to the next county.
Letting her know I like her by launching my eyeballs out of their sockets and dropping my tongue completely to the floor.
The prompt was about things we don’t already do in this reality though?
Don’t forget Turing your face into a wolf and howling about it.
