I see a lot of people saying it’s “okay” to be a virgin at 22, or if you’re 22 and have never been in a relationship, it’s “okay.” But it really isn’t. Most people lose their virginity when they’re teens, and most people get into their first relationships in high school. So if there’s a 22-year-old out there who’s still single, never been in a relationship, and is a virgin, they’re an outlier. They’re an anomaly, and it is something to feel bad and shameful about. It’s like never getting your driver’s license until you’re 21 or something. But it’s okay to feel bad and shameful—this can motivate you to make better decisions in life.
I guess I should be very ashamed of myself then. I got my license at 21. I’m now 22 and still a virgin. I’ve known for a long time that I move slower than others and I really don’t care. Like genuinely why do some people think having sex at a young age is like the most important thing ever?? Like why do you even care?
At 31, would I be happy to learn a potential partner my age is a Virgin? No. Would I be put off with a “I took my time and wasn’t prioritizing it over other things that mattered”? Also no.
The real turn off is a virgin who’s pissed about it, bitter about it, or well into adulthood and very focused on it. I’m not even saying nobody wants those people but as someone who’s been around the block a few times, is happily married and practices casual nonmonogamy I see people like that the same as I see people feeling similar ways about their other reasons for not getting laid.