First week it made me feel like there was a very light electric current running through my body. Not unpleasant, just a bit odd. Tingly. And yawning uncontrollably for a few hours after taking them for a few weeks.
Again, not unpleasant. But I absolutely embraced them, I did not fight the effects. I was very, very glad to try medications.
Now, after like 4 or 5 years, I can clearly tell the difference between before and after - the difference is, instead of downward spiralling into a hideous pit that I couldn’t climb out of, that spiralling downwards still starts, but it stops.
Instead of falling into the pit, I can just choose not to keep going down.
Things are still upsetting and I still take things worse than other people but I dont become out-of-control spiralling downwards forever until I can’t function. I have gained the ability to shrug and go “that sucks but, whatever”.
I felt this way, too. I also had a pleasant butterflies-in-my-stomach feeling near constantly for the first couple weeks.
I want to add another “everyone is different.”
As in, my major depressive disorder is comorbid with ADHD. Which means my particular brain is wired like someone insane put it together.
The ADHD diagnosis didn’t come until my mid-30s but the depression came before I was 10 years old, so I was trying everything on the market all those years. (Reminder to those of you still working on it that if there’s even one day of genuine joy to be found, all the misery will have been worth it, yes, even if it takes 20 years.)
SSRIs for me are treating a problem with a solution I don’t have. My brain refuses to make serotonin. There isn’t any of it, so controlling it’s uptake is pointless.
So it was just a massive variety of different types of numb, and different negative side effects. Of course, numb was preferable to misery, so I stayed on one or another for long stretches until I got the urge to try and find something that actually worked again.
They have no effect until you stop taking them. Then you hallucinate for a few weeks, like a low to medium dose of LSD.
i forget what exactly i had but it was in drops. This is from a perspective of someone for whom the meds didn’t work, rather, did the opposite of what they were supposed to
First week i felt nothing, second week i thought my anxiety was getting worse and really started hoping the meds kick in soon (let’s call it foreshadowing). Week three… well i noticed that in the mornings i feel alright, then i take the prescribed amount of drops, then i feel terrible, and in the evenings i feel alright again. My doctor told me effects fully kick in after around a month of treatment, and there can be some bad side effects at first, things getting worse before they get better kind of stuff, so i kept taking them hoping they start working as intended but the thing is- it didn’t stop there. Past week three my anxiety was constant, usually it gets triggered by something i have to do and then fades but when I was taking those SSRI it never stopped. I constantly felt like i was on the edge of a panic attack. I spent my days paralysed, just sitting before my PC trying to distract myself with comfort games & comfort videos, i didn’t even feel like i could play something more challenging or unpredictable than picross or tetris. It drove me to the point where i decided that i’m gonna risk it, do some ill-advised and understudied drug mixing and smoke weed
After 3 days of being nearly constantly high I decided to stop the meds. Though i was close to the elusive month of treatment i just couldn’t keep going like that, some people can stay high for weeks on end but not me, i do actually like being sober. And at that point being sober felt like hell. I gave it a quick Google and when i read that i can quit cold turkey (you can only do it if you haven’t been taking them for longer than a certain amount of time) i did.
It was fucking terrible, 3rd type of anxiety meds in a row that made me so much worse than normal. I’ve just been rawdogging my normal anxiety ever since, well, with some help of weed, alcohol and occasional psychedelics. It’s strange that so far the only “meds” i’ve found to be helpful are uh “self prescribed” so to say
this is obviously not something that happens to everyone, majority of people react fine to SSRIs, i’m apparently just not one of them :(
What do you think your anxiety is rooted in? When you get home, are you calm and laidback?
it’s mostly rooted in my fear of failure, disappointing others, or accidentally characterising myself as someone who’s incompetent or worthless. I have no idea when it spread so far i feel anxious about catching a bus but here i am
calm would be a big word hah, mostly relief, and then i need to take some time to fully relax because it doesn’t happen instantly
For me it felt like an uncomfortably mild head high. Some slight anxiety spikes, mild SI, quicker to anger.
Small, oblong, smooth but not slick. Very similar to many other pills.
Lexapro gang gang! Gave me insane bouts of diarrhea for the first week or so, but it helped fix what i thought was IBS, got me out of a severe crippling depression, and has helped immensely with my adhd. It pretty much renewed my lease on life. I was able to quit smoking a gram of dabs every week which i was using to self medicate ny depression, now i only take 1 CBD gummy a day to help with a neurological condition which other medications do nothing for. Wish i had started taking it sooner, but i thought i had it under control with the copious ammounts of weed i was smoking. I was so fucking wrong.
I was on Lexapro and I have ADHD as well. All it did for me was made me tired for the first week. And then nothing.
This is too broad of a question. There are many SSRIs and the people giving answers have not tried them all.
And each affect people differently.
I think the question was meant as, “what do/did they feel like to you, the person answering this question”
Like the first ten minutes after waking up from a really hard, hot, nap, all day, every day.
Less anxiety. For a bit there I felt like “nothing” and then I realized that’s what it feels like when I’m not constantly ruminating on all the crap that brings me anxiety.
Marginally happier for a few weeks and then absolutely nothing
So, I want to preface this with “it affects everyone differently”. If you are at all curious about it and live in a place with functioning healthcare, you may as well give them a try. Worst comes to worst, you try them for a month and they don’t work. Personally, I kinda wish I had tried them sooner.
Anyway, for me I think that they allow me to feel more of a “range” of emotions. I still have good and bad days, but that’s better than bad and terrible days. It’s actually interesting to me, because it feels like I’ve unlocked a range of emotions and need to learn how to manage them like a normal person.
I also sometimes get this weird euphoric feeling that everything is going to work out and that the world isn’t as bad as it seems. I also seem to be better at motivating myself, although still not good at it yet. Since taking them, I’ve been able to push boundries and do things I wasn’t confident doing before. But I still don’t exercise enough and eat too much takeout. :P
However, I do feel that there’s a tiredness in the back of my head that inhibits my ability to do intellectual tasks? Someone else described it as feeling like carrying an anvil around, and I can kinda see that. Although I did pick up a really bad habit of bedrotting during my depression, which I have yet to shake off. Maybe if I exercise more regularly I will feel better?
For libedo… I do feel that it has gone down a lot. Especially in the first few weeks of taking them. However, I also was really worried and obsessing over that part of them before taking them, so maybe I placebo’d myself into thinking I had issues? The biggest sex organ is the brain and all that. A lot of my anxiety and depression was related to sex stuff as well, so that may tie into it.
Anyway, that’s my experiences. Let me know if anyone has any more questions. I like talking about myself. :P
For me personally, it didn’t really feel like anything. Kind of like taking an over the counter pain medicine, it’s not an obvious change but the pain that was there before is numbed or even entirely gone. Not noticeable unless consciously thinking about it.
It took a while to find the right dosage (roughly a year, multiple hospital visits, and a divorce from a toxic marriage), but I went from being obsessed with suicide and doing multiple attempts every day to being horrified at the thought of suicide and wanting to live as long as possible.
Do you ever think it might have been getting away from the marriage that was the ultimate antidepressant? I’m starting to think 99% of the problem is environmental (like home life) and antidepressants are medicine’s way of modulating a status quo that is otherwise not economically changeable or feasible to change
Honestly I don’t think I would have filed for divorce before the medication. I was convinced that I was not only the problem, but that I was an evil villain, and that I was making the world a better place by killing myself. Suicide was the noble and heroic action in my mind at the time, and it’s only with the benefit of hindsight, continued medication, regular therapy, and reassurances from my family that I’m able to recognize how toxic my former situation was.
I used to be sceptical of antidepressants as well, wanting to try and fix things “properly”. But after getting in a really bad state, I decided to accept their “help”. Lifestyle changes are important, but antidepressants “take the edge off” and make it easier to implement those changes.
I think antidepressants should pretty much always be paired with other support or lifestyle changes though.
I think antidepressants should pretty much always be paired with other support or lifestyle changes though.
I completely agree with you. That’s not the experience my wife has had though. Finding the right professional to work with has been a challenge for her and her general practitioner has prescribed her SSRIs on more than one occasion without providing any guidance/assistance beyond “take this to feel better”.
Everything felt lighter. Depression for me felt like someone had increased the effects of gravity just for me. It took immense effort to get out of bed or to make myself move to accomplish anything. The meds turned gravity back to normal.
Like putting a fence around the spiralling pit of doom.