• bufalo1973@lemmy.ml
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    6 days ago

    A reply to a personal email from the direct boss but sending it to every other boss in the enterprise and including something in the line of “stop touching my balls!!!” (“deja de tocarme los cojones”).

        • ZapBeebz_@lemmy.world
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          5 days ago

          If it was meant in a “lay off me” or “get off my back” way, I think “stop busting my balls” would be an accurate translation

      • Marin_Rider@aussie.zone
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        5 days ago

        reminds me of a google review I saw once where a bar owner in Japan replied to a review and said something like “next time you are in town punch me in the face” which probably meant hit me up, but I loved it

  • eldavi@lemmy.ml
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    6 days ago

    The last time I was a team lead, I would sit in on meetings and whenever this one admin assistant was present she would complain about an analyst’s appearance saying things like he looked disheveled because his shirt had some wrinkles; but he was very much silicon-valley/california-shabby-chic fashioned for the time.

    We got bought out by a bank complete with stereotypical old fashioned management and dinosaur sensibilities from the East Coast. She brought up the analyst again during one of our meetings that included the new management and the analyst was fired the next day.

    • QuarterSwede@lemmy.world
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      6 days ago

      Eastern and Western US work ideals clash all the time. I’m in CO and we are definitely a we work to play state not we live to work and I haven’t seen an actual suit worn by anyone other than a lawyer around here, even at church. As soon as someone from the east coast shows up it’s painfully obvious. We don’t have much tolerance for their go, go, go ways and usually show them a great time and a relaxed vibe to relax them a bit. They’re always perplexed at how we can perform so well with such a relaxed attitude. Doesn’t usually click that it’s correlated.

      • spongebue@lemmy.world
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        6 days ago

        Also Colorado. Granted, covid didn’t give me much opportunity here but I wore a suit this summer for the first time in about 5 years. It was a wedding and I was the officiant 🙃

        • QuarterSwede@lemmy.world
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          6 days ago

          Oh I’m sorry, weddings and prom are still very formal, true. But a lot are western wear these days. Good point.

          • spongebue@lemmy.world
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            6 days ago

            Oh no, I wasn’t trying to disprove your point at all! Just showing how extreme the situation needs to be to justify a suit. From what I remember most of the guests didn’t wear a suit either, but I can totally see it being a thing on the east coast.

      • tamal3@lemmy.world
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        5 days ago

        Wait… People don’t have a work-to-live attitude in CO? I live in NC where everyone works their lives away. Are you telling me I can move, even within the US, and that’s not the case? I know NC is terrible for workers, but if it’s that much of a discrepancy then I would pack and go elsewhere asap.

        • QuarterSwede@lemmy.world
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          5 days ago

          First thing I got told when I moved from NoVA to CO as a manager was people work to play. That has proven true time and time again. Snows a lot, everyone calls out and hits the slopes. Gorgeous day and they’ve just recently stocked a favorite fishing spot? Calls out to fish. Hunting season and got one of the lottery elk tags? Puts vacation in or unpaid time off since they’re extremely hard to get and goes off trying to bag and elk ok the western slope. Recently upgraded your Jeep? They’re definitely taking it off road on a mountain trail stat. Yeah, we have a ton of fun out here.

      • eldavi@lemmy.ml
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        5 days ago

        colorado felt like another silicon-valley-ish niche to me so this makes sense, but i’m surprised to hear about the work perspective because the people i worked with in colorado tended to have more socially conservative views than my californian colleagues complete w an early-to-bed-early-to-rise work ethic.

        the denver-boulder area, in person, is hard to distinguish from places like austin if not for the climate and geography; the general attitudes of strangers towards me made that place no different than anywhere in texas for me.

  • Eww@lemmy.world
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    5 days ago

    I worked in a call center for an internal support team. We had a group that started early in the morning since our headquarters was on the West Coast and calls would come in really early from the East Coast offices. Every Friday we would organize a group order for breakfast from a local diner and I usually was the one who would go and pick it up (long before DoorDash). One particular morning the order was missing a side of bacon for one of the team members. This person got so angry that they didn’t have their bacon, they decided it would be a good idea to call the diner from the middle of our office while most agents were on the phone with end uses. They proceeded to yell at and lecture the poor diner worker who answered the phone saying things like “You forgot my damn bacon, I think you did it on purpose” and “What are you gonna do to fix this?” The call lasted a couple minutes as most of us were looking at one another in shock. Unsurprisingly, they did not return on Monday and we all couldn’t believe someone was fired for missing bacon.

  • Schlemmy@lemmy.ml
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    6 days ago

    I got fired for reading the newspaper during my lunch break. Once a week this newspaper came with a for hire section that also included career advice and al that stuff. I was reading that part but the CEO called me into his office to tell me off. I called his bluff and he fired me.

    I was scheduled to lead a team in China for a few weeks and after that had to go to the US for some other job. Sadly people that are fired can’t work off premises anymore so the staff manager begged me to accept their withdrawal of my discharge.

    I kindly declined and got payed out a years’ wage. Took the time to reorientate into less toxic work environment. I now work with politicians, don’t know what happened there.

    • njm1314@lemmy.world
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      4 days ago

      This CEO thought that someone who was going to lead a team in China for his company would look for work through the newspaper?

      • Schlemmy@lemmy.ml
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        4 days ago

        This is about 20 years ago. Anyway, the absurdity of the situation still strikes me today. I was reading the newspaper provided by the company and mister manager was angry that I read something he didn’t like so he tried to force me into submission.

      • Schlemmy@lemmy.ml
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        6 days ago

        He first lade a threat. Then I called his bluff and then he pushed through.

        In that way I got my full year off.

        The stupid thing was that I was fired for reading a newspaper. I didn’t take it up to court because I knew I was getting a full years pay if they fired me that way.

          • Schlemmy@lemmy.ml
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            5 days ago

            Contractual and lawful reasons.

            You can’t be fired without proper cause so when they fire you without proper cause the wil have to keep you on board for a while or choose to pay you out for that amount of time. I was sort of a foreman with a teal of about 20 technicians and I also had to work directly with our customers. They deemed me a liability because I was fired so they chose to pay out.

            Same with salesmen. When you fire them without proper cause they want you out of their network as soon as possible and won’t take the risk of letting you work with costumers anymore so they just pay out the amount of time that is needed.

          • Zacpod@lemmy.world
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            5 days ago

            In Canada. If I get canned my severance is 1.5 years salary. (Based on length of emplyment.) It’s even better in Europe. It’s what happens when a country doesn’t flipflop between two right wing parties and actually has a party focused on the working class.

  • EnderMB@lemmy.world
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    5 days ago

    Oh boy, I’ve seen a few:

    • At a startup, one dude had obviously lied about his credentials. He was hired as a writer, but couldn’t write shit. He spent the entire day hitting on women and bitching about how his ex wanted support for a child he wasn’t convinced was his. He was fired about 3 days in…

    • When I was a student, I worked at a sports store. One girl there was, let’s say, packing in the chest compartment. She was also about 17, maybe 18. Most people were nice enough to not hit on her, but one day the security guard (who was maybe late thirties at the youngest) made a comment to me to say “I would absolutely destroy her back door, you know?” (but slightly more graphic). I told management, and she was brought in. She broke down, and went over all the off-hand comments he’d made to her. The manager immediately walked out, told him he was fired, and apologised to her.

    • An old employer hired this guy who was a Microsoft MVP nominee. The guy was one of those types that could talk brilliantly, but couldn’t take criticism. He listened to me, as I was senior, but ignored anything from managers or people at his level. To cut a long story short (I could write a book on this guy, and it would be hilarious) he lied about a project he worked on solo for six months. After checking in on his work we found he had bypassed our PR system and had been accepting all of his own requests, so no one has verified his code. It was an absolute mess. It cost the company a quarter of a million, for a project that should have brought in £50k. We later found out he was a nominee because he was so active on some Microsoft support forums, and mostly got that through posting “yeah I had the same problem” or from supplying easy or wrong answers. That loophole was closed shortly after…

    • BoxOfFeet@lemmy.world
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      3 days ago

      That reminds me of a guy at a company party that was making lewd comments about the head of HR. He told the guy next to him he’d f her so hard, sparks would fly out of her vagina. Didn’t realize he was talking to her fiancé. Then, proceeded to grope another female employee. When they called him I to the front office the next day, he honestly had no idea he was getting fired. He thought he was getting a promotion.

  • habitualcynic@lemmy.world
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    5 days ago

    Watched a guy with an iPad stuffed down the front of his pants walk out through a metal detector. The outline and part of the box were very visible.

    • PM_Your_Nudes_Please@lemmy.world
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      6 days ago

      I’ve heard of similar things. Boss wants to see who is the least busy, so they do something like open an employee gym. Then anyone who uses it is fired, because “if you have time to use the gym, you’re not working hard enough.”

      • Doxatek@mander.xyz
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        4 days ago

        Exactly. There was also a puzzle table once. The higher boss said he loved to see people building teamwork and closer relationships and liked the puzzle. I luckily knew the whole time that even though he said this he fucking hated the puzzle. I winced everytime he’d catch someone working on it. Some people are just oblivious AF. “He said he likes the puzzle!” Yeah he said that, but he absolutely does not and you’re probably on the shit list now

      • spongebue@lemmy.world
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        6 days ago

        Assuming not-Montana US, you can be fired for any reason other than membership in a protected class (race, religion, etc). Attending an ice cream social, even a company one, is not a protected class.

      • Volkditty@lemmy.world
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        6 days ago

        It was a frozen yogurt company. The ice cream was a ruse to smoke out those not committed to the cause.

  • herrvogel@lemmy.world
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    6 days ago

    I got fired when the company decided to downsize.

    “How is that dumb?” you ask? That happened less than two weeks after I was hired. The boss man’s speech indicated that that was the result of a long deliberation by corporate. So if you knew there could be layoffs any moment, why the fuck were you hiring?

    • superkret@feddit.org
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      6 days ago

      What do you think would happen if the C-suite called HR and told them “we’re about to announce a downsizing in 2 months, stop hiring people”?

      • Professorozone@lemmy.world
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        6 days ago

        I worked for a company that did just that and it was the best way to do it because a lot of people left on their own.

        • superkret@feddit.org
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          6 days ago

          The problem is that this way, your best people with the most options leave first.
          Those you want to keep long enough to do the re-structuring and make the numbers on the books look good, so you can sell the company before it disintegrates completely.

          • Breadhax0r@lemmy.world
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            6 days ago

            Aren’t those people also the first to be let go? They’re the most expensive and you can maximize short term profits by letting go to expensive employees and hiring on cheap ones.

          • Professorozone@lemmy.world
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            6 days ago

            Not always. I think the best people think they WON’T be let go and some others who don’t perform, figure they are on the chopping block.

            In our case it didn’t matter because they wound up having four rounds of layoffs before shutting that location down entirely. So it really wound up being WHEN you were fired, not IF.

    • Professorozone@lemmy.world
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      6 days ago

      Yup, I worked for a company that was laying off but they were still hiring because, “they had a hiring policy.” Absolutely nonsensical.

    • Thorry84@feddit.nl
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      6 days ago

      This is usually done to keep things going as normal as possible for as long as possible. Once people start noticing something is wrong, the best people start looking elsewhere. Before you know it, not only is the company in financial trouble, but it can’t recover because some of the best people left. At least one time I witnessed, the company was working on layoff plans and even limited bankruptcy, but at the same time negotiating with the investment firm that owned part of the company to get more money. If they got the money, everything would be fine. It wasn’t till that fell through, they had to start laying people off.

      • qevlarr@lemmy.world
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        6 days ago

        Exactly. Companies are typically working on multiple conflicting scenarios because you don’t know which it’s going to be

        • Robust Mirror@aussie.zone
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          5 days ago

          Right but you’re trying to avoid them leaving before that in case you get a win and don’t need to make the lay-offs. If they leave earlier the win you’re hoping for may no longer be enough to save you.

  • LifeOfChance@lemmy.world
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    6 days ago

    Someone secretly took a photo of someone else because they didn’t like the shirt and sent it to so many people not realizing they all liked the person and immediately told them. He had HR involved within minutes and she was fired. All of that happened in about 20 minutes of the photo being taken. There is a strict policy on photos of other people at work that has its own training we all do annually.

    For those wondering about the shirt

  • frank@sopuli.xyz
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    6 days ago

    This is technically fired, but it’s more like quitting. It doesn’t perfectly fit this thread but I love telling this story.

    A few months into my first real job, the engineers got their raises (not me, I was new). 0%, after record profits, the team busting their ass and working insane hours, and promises of good raises. I think they got some gift cards or something.

    One of my coworkers goes back to his desk, packs some stuff, walks to his car, and doesn’t come back. He got paid for a full month before they finally fired him. We got a beer after and he was like “oh I don’t think I’m gonna go back” in the most Office Space way

      • frank@sopuli.xyz
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        6 days ago

        Our boss was like “I’m sure he’s mad but he’ll cool off” for way too long lol

        We also worked some insane hours across many locations so it wasn’t abnormal to not see your office mates for weeks at a time

        • Broken@lemmy.ml
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          6 days ago

          There was a woman who was a retail store manager who just upped and left for the Congo. (Yes, really) Corporate didn’t fire her for a year. (Yes, really)

    • superkret@feddit.org
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      6 days ago

      How is what he did dumb?
      He only continued to refuse to increase the spending limit, which is basically the only thing he promised to do if he was elected.
      I mean, that position is completely wrong in the current situation, but it’s not a change from his position 3 years ago.

      • groet@feddit.org
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        6 days ago

        Yeah he came in with an agenda (block all legislation that could hurt his luxury car daddies). And he achieved all if that. Now his job is done and he gets to retire early.

        • superkret@feddit.org
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          6 days ago

          He rendered the left-leaning government ineffective, making a shift to the right in the next election more probable, then triggered early elections.
          Genius, really.

  • AlphaOmega@lemmy.world
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    6 days ago

    Working at a call center and we had bonuses for people that could book the most hotel rooms (hotels.com). This one lady suddenly started winning all the bonuses day after day. This went on for almost 2 weeks. Then the FBI showed up. Turned out she was just stealing people’s CC numbers and booking them hotel rooms without them knowing.

    • TexasDrunk@lemmy.world
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      6 days ago

      I did this briefly years ago for a hotel chain (the booking, not the stealing). We got an extra quarter for everyone we transferred to another department for deals or some shit. We were supposed to ask people if they would like to hear about it but I found out that as long as it transferred they could immediately hang up and I still got my bonus. After that every caller I had got transferred to the other department for the rest of the time I worked there.

      I made an extra few hundred bucks and got canned about the same time I found a job in my field. No FBI involved, though.

  • mwproductions@lemmy.world
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    6 days ago

    Early in my career, a co-worker was fired for (among other things), frequently sleeping at his desk when he was supposed to be working. The entire company was half a dozen people in a single room. I have no idea what he was thinking.

  • Pacattack57@lemmy.world
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    5 days ago

    Work in a warehouse where boxes open all the time and fall out on the floor. This supervisor found a box of spilled pens and used one of them to write something down and they fired him for stealing 😂. I think they were looking for a reason cuz he was kind of uncontrollable.