I’m a perfectionist and I realized I’ve been making life too hard for myself. Choosing a low bar for success but keeping the ceiling high has felt like a much healthier approach.
“Anything worth doing is worth doing poorly” I try to remind myself, with a history of postponing things, and not wanting to imperfectly do things. Rarely I’ve regretted doing to my current ability, but countless times leaving things undone.
The consultant’s proverb: done is better than perfect
Between a pragmatist and a perfectionist, one of them sleeps soundly and knows what he’s doing tomorrow.
That property has more rights and protections than people do.
The value of human life, in reality, is much lower than I thought it would be.
Laws and rights are only as good as the people & mechanisms that enforce them. A piece of paper doesn’t protect you, people do.
That people often prefer a comforting delusion over the truth, even if it hurts them in the long run.
Dating lol
Basic necessities arent a given and one should b grateful for em
Grateful to who?
I think you can just be grateful to have or experience something. Like you can’t be grateful to anyone for a full moon, but you can be grateful that you saw it.
Yeah, I didn’t know people were just giving out basic necessities. I’ve been allowing people to exploit my labor for nothing this whole time?
The people who give them to you?
Double entry bookkeeping.
Who was committing fraud?
That there’s a opensource version of reddit!!
Nah I feel like I hopped on right on time. When this first started out there wasn’t too much content.
Being a good person is a weakness in capitalist civilizations.
Oh, please. It’s most definitely not.
Agree. If you were 100% capitalist and everything you did was about money, then maybe. But most of us balance that for the benefit of our mental health and, well, not being a dick.
@UltraGiGaGigantic It’s the only way to fight, though.
I know plenty of assholes who aren’t rich, so I don’t think there’s any correlation.
@bstix You don’t have to be rich to be an asshole, but you almost certainly have to be an asshole to get rich.
Its a super power, actually. Everytime I meet one they impact my life so deeply I can’t help but admire them and completely swoon.
I’m glad people still admire altruism. I have ADHD and a weird symptom of it is a “rigid moral compass” and a “strong sense of righteousness”.
I had pretty cynical and rich parents that were very skeptical of my worldview and attitude. I sort of accepted that I’d remain alone by " doing the right thing". Glad to see it may not be that way 🤞
It’s few and far between. A good person isn’t a perfect person. It’s someone who does the hard thing because it’s the right thing. People also fall in and out of being their best selves. That’s exceptable as well. So, if you truly want to experience a genuinely good person, you have to trust they are before they can show you. If you want to be one don’t do it by following some strict rules set. Look for places where you can help then just be yourself.
If all I’ve ever known of you is the best side of you, flawed and all, to me, you were nothing but good.
The thing that comes only with age is: to not give a fuck.
When we learn that it doesn’t matter we can all be little old people who are purple mohawk headed, wearing clashing neon adidas jumpsuit with zebra primted boas.
I only learned this a few weeks ago at 40 years old, now my hair is blue, both my ears are pierced and I’m a lot happier. I told my 19 year old daughter that “what will people think?” has been my mantra, now it’s “fuck 'em”
"at 20, you care the world what everyone thinks of you
At 40 you learn to not care what anyone thinks of you
At 60, you realize nobody has been thinking about you at all, the whole time."
If you quit worrying what people think of you, you’ll realize how seldom they do.
Hey, I’m you and you’re me! I also just turned 40 in late September. Happy belated birthday, ya old fart!
There’s always someone who will look at your life telling you you’re doing everything wrong. And you know what? That’s fine. It really doesn’t matter.
I don’t feel too late to learn anything so far.
It’s OK to only do what you KNOW you are capable of doing. Too many people hurt themselves trying to push themselves too hard, when they just aren’t ready yet.
Empathy, Hurt people hurt people.
I met a lot of people with traumatic histories, and were very insecure. They are utterly exhausting to be around. Constant nitpicking, valid criticism with brutal delivery. Make excuses to undermine others accomplishments.
They are not bad people, or have malicious intentions, but can only be described as utterly exhausting. You are always on edge.
The sunk cost fallacy is a very easy way to get stuck being miserable.
Sometimes a drastic change might be painful at the time but will be much better for you overall.
Definitely agree with this one
No matter how hard you try, how loud you cry, some people will never change.
Brushing teeth regularly, and flossing , is more important than I ever realized.
I’m dreading the day my bad mouth hygiene will catch up to me… I know how bad it is but I still can’t get myself to brush every night.
If you’re like me, then some time in your thirties. I didn’t brush from early teens through until then - I had several abcesses and needed seven teeth removed, including my top fronts. Turns out I had undiagnosed autism, depression and low self image. Now I do brush, and it’s just a case of forcing myself to adapt to a routine. Even keeping some flouride mouthwash handy for a quick swill every now and then helps a bit. Hope you find your way.
It gets mighty expensive.
I was like you, the transition was not easy, but what helped me was to brush my teeth when I already went to the bathroom to pee. This meant that I rarely brush my teeth at the same time. But I do it every night now. This also helped me reduce my snacking after 20:00. Because I didn’t want to snack after brushing my teeth. I convinced myself I was going to do this and ever since I only missed 2 nights. What also helped is using a tracking app where I could check it to “gameify” it.
Have you tried putting your toothbrush and toothpaste in the shower? I’ve struggled with brushing my whole life and this is the only thing I’ve ever tried that actually worked. I also put a brush and paste at every sink but the only time I can ever actually manage to brush is in the shower.
Brush whilst the water is heating up means you’re doing your bit to help the environment! And other such half truths I tell myself to get through the day.
Man good dental hygiene is one of those things you just do not think about until you’re older. Flossing, interdental, mouth wash (before brushing), regularly visiting the hygienist and dentist. Your teeth evolved to last 35-ish years, the rest only happens from hygiene.
Mouthwash before brushing? Because you don’t rinse out the toothpaste?
Yes 100% that. I’ve never met a dentist who didn’t immediately tell me to rinse before brushing on hearing I used mouthwash; they all categorically said not to do it after brushing.
Well, that totally makes sense, thanks. I’ve been doing it the other way around for some reason
You can blame the Listerine ads for that.
Compound interest.
